Nowadays, I am increasingly facing THE question in life which everybody claims to
have grappled with. There is increasing disinterest in work. I am totally confused
with what do I want to do with my life. I had read Paulo Cohello's "The Alchemist"
long back and wondered why am I not facing the internal urge that Santiago faced.
He seemed so clear of what he wanted to do with his life and I envy him. I have no idea where I want to go. Do I want to just be a rudderless boat drifting along with the world ? I certainly dont think so. Everybody and most of all I myself am getting impatient with my lack of direction. I am resisting making a stable set of decisions fearing that I will be stuck with it. I know for sure that I dont want to be in the sector I am currently in. It doesnt excite me at all. I tried to get interested in other conventional areas like finance( at one point in life not much far away I thought that finance is my only hope) but sadly that is not the case.
The extent to which I have known myself, I can jot down just two areas where I take active interest
(1) Space
(2) Music
These are the two areas to which I find an internal pull. But throughout my life, I never did anything towards this area. Primarily because there never was any promise in this fields. I followed the herd and though it seems that I have done quite well in conventional sense, I myself dont feel that I have done anything worthwhile. There is no satisfaction. Time and again, I read about how people left their regular well-paying job and started on their own pursuing their dreams, doing what they really liked, but i never could gather enough courage to do that. The financial safety is the biggest reason, coupled with family responsibility. Will I ever be able to manage both, family responsibility as well as my dreams. I have serious doubts over it.
I think I need to sit down alone and do some soul-searching, spending time to know myself. There is just so much going on everywhere in my life I am not able to think or rather I am avoiding to think..god knows...
One thing is for sure...I will be dead if I dont enjoy what I do
Till then
adios
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Life crisis
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1 comment:
Does that mean that even finance doesn't interest you now? You know, I don't think it is unusual or bad to think and feel the way that you are doing. I think it is pretty normal and one MUST! Because only then one learns to prioritize whats important in life. Earlier the better!! So...congratulations !! :-) You have come one step closer to realizing your dream!
But I think you should not just be doing your job leaving out other interests. You can very well start learning guitar well! Or any other hobby that interests you! That will bring new zest into your life!
I am buying a classical guitar in a day or two. Will also start going to classes!
Take care,
Rintu
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